problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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