Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize