I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
