Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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