Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Randomize
