but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
