Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
