I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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