everyone is single if you try hard enough
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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