I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
