If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
The air was thick with penises
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Randomize
