It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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