Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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