dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize