are you still at the devil's house?
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
you made out with another girl for some wings
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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