Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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