it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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