Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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