so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
