Can Purell be used as lube?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
