Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
