also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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