well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
