If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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