Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Randomize
