God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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