I'm gonna have a badass scar
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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