Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
