He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
