You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
