Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
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