Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I feel like abortions should bother me more
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
