Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
