Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
