At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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