Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
