It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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