I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize
