someone get that fucking seahorse.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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