the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
