Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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