Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My hand turned me down
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
