Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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