I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize