We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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