Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
