haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Blood and glitter go together right?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
