I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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