Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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