I bet he comes in French.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
